A mother's vow

When Corrie, Ashlie and Austin were little I was NOT a PTA mom. In fact, I went on one field trip with the kids and vowed I would never do that again. Now that the kids are older though I really want to be involved in their lives. I definitely have been to every band performance, every baseball, softball, basketball, volleyball, soccer game (unless I was traveling for work). I have seen every school play and every Boy Scout award ceremony. I have loved every minute of it no matter how crazy it can get. But sometimes I feel like just a spectator to my kid's life instead of being involved. When I made the decision to quit working one of the things I said is I wanted to be INVOLVED in my kid's lives. Unfortunately I have 2 little ones that demand my attention too. I really would love to help coach Corrie in volleyball. I would love to take Austin to the park and play baseball with him more. I would love to be able to play a duet with Ashlie. And maybe soon I will be able to. But one of the things I cherish the most right now is the time I have with the kids when they come home from school. Ashlie is home about 40 minutes before Corrie and Austin so I get to hear about school, boys and friends. When Corrie and Austin come home I get to hear about school. Not too much about boys, girls and friends, but that is ok. I even really enjoyed it when I took the kids to their doctor appointments. After their appointments we went to lunch together. For the first time I wasn't in a hurry to get back to work. And quite frankly I wasn't in a hurry to get them back to school. I just wanted to enjoy the time with them. Usually the days are so crazy I don't have time to absorb what is going on with the kids until really late at night when everyone is asleep. There have been so many times over the years that I would have loved to crawl in bed with the kids and just hold them, but I never have. I made a vow that if I ever wanted to be with my kids no matter if it is 4 in the morning or 3 in the afternoon then I am going to be with my kids. Last night I stayed true to that vow. Ashlie had her band performance last night. We didn't get home until after 11. As soon as we picked her up I knew something was wrong, but some of me thought it was just that she was tired. She had been gone since 1 that afternoon. As soon as she got home she immediately went to bed. Jeff and I got the babies to bed and hit the pillow ourselves. I woke up about 3:30 last night to feed one of the babies. ( I am so tired I usually don't comprehend who is crying. I just lead the bottle to the source of the most noise) I was about ready to go back to sleep when I started thinking about Ashlie. I really started missing her. I really wanted to hold her in my arms. Part of my kept saying it is 4 in the morning. Another part of me kept saying, "Then get your butt up and go hold your daugher". Thankfully I listened to the right voice. I went into Ashlie's room and sat down beside her on her bed. I didn't even care if she woke up. I just wanted to be there with her. She did wake up and we talked for a couple of minutes over what happened that night to upset her so much. Finally she said she was falling asleep so I gave her a big hug and kiss and told her good night. Both of us cherished those few minutes we were able to share....even if it was 4 in the morning.